A Letter to a Worrier: Here’s How To Worry Less - IGBOAFRICANA
Igboafricana 2017. Powered by Blogger.

A Letter to a Worrier: Here’s How To Worry Less

by - January 05, 2023

how to worry less

Dear Worrier, If you’re reading this, I’m guessing you were having one of those moments when you couldn’t get a thought or idea that is not within your control out of your mind, then figured you’d come to the internet looking for answers on how to kick out that obnoxious feeling and move on ASAP, which is why you happened to find yourself on my website. 

 FYI this blog is going to be seasoned with bible texts, short stories, and half-truths. So if you're into that kind of thing then stay for the tea. I’ve read and spoken to enough people who know that I worry too much, and while every time I tell myself I would take every bit of advice and notes that I've come across to move past it, I just happen to give myself something new and improved to worry about.

 In the last couple of months, I had spent every waking moment worrying about driving around Lagos, and while most people may never notice, trust me it’s there. I just happen to cling to these wise words “Fake it till you make it” to push through on most days. 

 Yes, before we get into some texts that have helped me push through, I don't think it would be fair to not mention how being a little fake plays a role in how I navigate moments of anxiety. I think the funniest part of my writing this is I’m currently anxious about something, and I said a prayer under my breath asking the holy spirit to guide me on what I should do, and you guys the word that came to me was “nothing” I’m not a nothing-doer, so you can imagine my struggle!
While I tried to battle this with passages like I can do all things through Christ that strengthens me, he hit me back with a “Which includes nothing”

So recently, I can be anxious and also sit in the comfort of doing nothing because taking action nowadays doesn’t seem to do much for me. 

 At this point, I’m currently worrying if this has in any way been of help to you because honestly there's a possibility perhaps I’m writing this is to make myself feel better about my feelings, kind of like a journal but you get access because misery loves it's share of company. 

You might be thinking “this fraud made me open her website with a promise to show me how to not worry, and now she’s talking about how the holy spirit, misery, and nothingness.”

It gets deeper I promise, and to prove it, i'll kick of with one of my favourite parts of the bible to read when I get overwhelmed with fear. In Philippians 4:6-7 NIV the bible says “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the Peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” 

 The thing about the message is my anxieties aren’t exactly cured by this instant command to not be anxious, rather I've found comfort in the follow up that says; “in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” 
 I remember when I started driving to work, and every day at 3:00 pm I start getting shaky because it was about to be another long daunting drive back to the mainland in Lagos, from my office on the Island. 

Some days I would enter the toilet just before I leave and begin to listen to every Christian podcast under that speaks to anxiety, at one point those 5-6 minutes affirming videos on youtube by Pastor Steven Furick of Elevation church became my crutch.   While on most days the relief was temporary, It was effective enough to get me into the car and back on the road. 

 At the time I never drove above 60MPH and would get jumpy when tailgaters honked at me. It got slightly tiring that I would take driving breaks and leave my car that I spent an entire year praying for at home.

One day I said one of my silent prayers while gripping the steering, “God I commit the navigation of this vehicle to you, please help me get home in peace” I will never forget one of the few things I felt in my heart, was I would get better over time, and even then he will be with me, but I need to keep driving. 

 The wicked thing about worrying is that it doesn't chose an aspect of your life to camp, it usually affects all, from Love, money, career, you name it.

I would love to give you more practical examples of what these have looked like in my life, but I’d rather not spill.  I will tell you this, arming yourself scripture for every situation will help, somedays it will stop heart beating faster than usually, and some days it wouldn't but it will get you to move. It kind of upgrades your anxiety to a “worried but not paralyzed” phase. 

 Finally, Sharpening your trust in God is the final way to purge your worries when they begin to get consuming, you can call it the endgame. I never worry about things within my control because at the crux of things, I trust myself.  So if only there was someone who had control of everything past, present, and future we could trust. 

 Random question; Do you trust God’s plan for you is better than anything you can cook up ? 
Sit in that thought and use it to challenge worrying thoughts from time to time. 

 I've curated some of my favourite words from the bible that get moving despite my worrying; 

On the days I’m worrying about money or just my finances in general… 
25 Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? 
26  Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 
27 Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life? 
28 “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labour or spin. 
29 Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendour was dressed like one of these. 
30 If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? 
31 So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 
32 For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 
33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 
34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. 

 When I feel overwhelmed by my Life in general… 

Psalms 94:19
19 When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought me joy. 

 When I’m working on something or learning something new that’s making me doubt myself… 
Proverbs 3:5-6

 5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;
 6  in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.

Perhaps you’re not the worrier and you’re trying to get someone you love out of their funk… 

 Anxiety weighs down the heart, but a kind word cheers it up. 

 When I worry about love or my relationships… 

There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.

 For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline. 

To end my letter, I’d say this;  if at any point you feel that overwhelming sense of worry, know you’re not alone, and while you may not have the answers you want or the things you need that are causing you to feel that way, you have God and trust me, he’s enough.

You May Also Like